Sunday School

For the first time in years, I have been attending Sunday school. Our pastor is leading a group for people who want to become new members of the church. Our first session, we went around the circle and told the story of how we came to be at Akron Christian Reformed.

My mom is sitting in on the group to refresh her understanding of the Reformed Church, and started off her story with tears. She discussed the many hard relationships she had been in. She shared that her counselor at the time urged her to come to church with him, and on that first Sunday she wanted to leave because the church was so small that there was no place to hide. There was no place to hide where people wouldn't see the bruises. She talked about all of the love and acceptance that she found in those people.

When it came to be my turn, I was already teary because my mom was crying about all the stuff we had gone through as a family. I then had to tell about my church journey with Ernest and attending a Lutheran church for the 7 years I was with him. After the divorce, I stopped going to church for a long time. I would occasionally go with my mom, when she begged, but I couldn't get over my distrust of the church. It took me a long time to realize that the situation with Ernest, was not directly related to the church.

For the people that don't know, Ernest and I dated for 5 years before we got married when I was 20. He was on track to become a Lutheran Pastor, so going to church was an important thing for us. Shorty after the wedding, Ernest began to get violent and soon was abusive. I had a real hard time understanding why someone that was going into the ministry thought that it was ok to hurt his wife, someone that he promised to take care of. I felt like the church and the seminary must have known what kind of person he was. He had gone through hours of psychologic evaluations to get into the seminary...they must have known the true person he was, right? I was so irritated that the church would ordain someone like that and give him his own church. I felt like somehow the church had let me down and was putting others in jeopardy. It has taken me years to find peace with the situation and to realize that it is out of my hands and is something I shouldn't worry about.

So back to the church/Sunday school story...lol...I told my story and how it took a long time for me to feel at home in another church after my experiences with Ernest and just how grateful I am to have found a church that I can call home.

*I am not someone who is going to "push" going to church on someone. I just thought I would update everyone on something that is going on in my life. I feel happier going to church.